A Nana's Request Sparked an Introduction
Former Black Stick Gemma McCaw has opened up about the early days of her relationship with now-husband, former All Black captain Richie McCaw, revealing she left his messages on "seen" twice before they ever went on a date.
Speaking on theBetween Two Beers podcast, McCaw recounted how the pair first met at a community sporting event in Hamilton. Her nana had asked her — then Gemma Flynn — to get Richie's signature on a rugby ball for a terminally-ill 10-year-old boy who loved the All Blacks.
"He turned around and I remember thinking 'oh, you're very looking'," she said, adding, "I truly believe that my nana brought us together."
The Olympics Came First
Following that encounter, McCaw said she received a Facebook message from the former All Blacks captain, sent right before the 2012 Olympics kicked off. She recalled being amused by his profile picture — aTop Gun shot of Tom Cruise as Maverick with dog tags.
"I left him on seen because I never wanted anything to get in the way of that Olympics," she said. NZ Herald reported McCaw told the podcast hosts she forgot to reply, but explained there was more to it than that. With the Olympics a week away, she was reluctant to let anything distract her from hockey.
"I never wanted to let anything get in the way of that Olympic campaign," she said. "Not having a partner and being able to give everything at that time was just really, really important."
When the hosts pointed out she had left one of New Zealand's most famous sportsmen on read, McCaw admitted she also was not sure what to make of his online profile. "I mean, he had Top Gun as his profile, like Tom Cruise, like Maverick ... with the dog tags as his profile picture," she said.
A Second Message, a Second 'Seen'
But McCaw's silence did not deter Richie. After she missed a penalty shootout in New Zealand's semi-final loss at the London Olympics, he reached out again.
"When I missed the shoot-out, 'Maverick' popped up again," she said. According to NZ Herald, Richie said he had watched the game and referenced his own experience after the All Blacks' shock exit from the 2007 Rugby World Cup.
"He said, 'I've seen you've missed the shootout and I know the feeling because in 2007...' and it was quite a lengthy message about what he went through," she recounted.
And again, the All Black captain was left on seen — but not forever. "It's like everyone you know in your life is out of the woodwork messaging you and you actually don't have any capacity to write back to everyone," McCaw said. "So again I just left it till after the Olympics when I could reply."
She left him waiting a few more weeks before finally replying.
A First Date in the Headlines
The pair eventually got past the unanswered messages. On their memorable first date, the two went out for coffee and ended up on the front page ofWoman's Day the following week. McCaw described it as "quite unnerving" to be a 22-year-old dating someone at the centre of the public eye and 10 years older.
"It can be tiring," she said.
Life After Sport and Motherhood
The podcast conversation also touched on how McCaw's fast-paced lifestyle had to change once she had children, and how being a mother has shaped her.
"We try to be good people; we try to be authentic and celebrate people," she said of how she and Richie navigate their public and private lives.
The couple, who married in 2017, now have three daughters. Reflecting on finding her identity away from hockey, McCaw said, "After three children, at my age, I know who I am." She added, "I've had to be okay with the person I am, without Gemma the hockey player or the sports person. I'm actually comfortable with that."